I was recently telling a great guy friend a story about a man walking up to me in the grocery just to tell me he thought I was ugly.
My friend couldn’t believe it.
Were you following him? No.
Could he have thought you were someone else? No.
Was he actually flirting with you? No.
(You like how he was trying to make it my fault? Don’t crucify him. He’s learning.)
No, I had never seen this grocery store man before, and I had my head in the freezer getting frozen veggies when he tapped me on the shoulder to deliver the bulletin.
I went on to tell my friend that the same thing had happened to another of my gorgeous female friends as she was walking down the street in Nashville.
A few moments had passed when he said, “I suppose that, as a woman, you have no idea what it’s like to walk into a room of straight guys and not be sized up.”
Beats me, really. How do I know what anyone else is thinking? I would certainly assume I’ve walked into plenty of those rooms, but I don’t know.
My friend confessed that as far back as he could remember, he and his friends were not only hormonally compelled to talk about the physical appearance of every girl they met, it was encouraged. In locker rooms, by older brothers, by male adults, etc. He said it was still a large part of the conversation he has with his buddies.
He said, “Wow, that must be exhausting for you all.”
*giggle* Ya’ think?!?!?!?!?!?
Still, when it all comes down, what others think of us doesn’t matter nearly as much as what we think of ourselves.
So, ladies, how do we address this?
Raise your daughters to know they’re beautiful no matter what anyone else tells them.
Remind your friends that they matter.
Show people what confidence looks like.
…and, God forbid, if some random man walks up to you in the grocery store to specifically tell you you’re ugly, may you have the mental fortitude to kick him in that special spot which will bring him the most clarity. 😉